rpale1

I recently had a conversation with a very good friend of mine concerning the disparity of suicide and depression within the African American culture and the stigma’s attached to it.

While discussing the plight of the African American male and his lack of communication in reaching out and seeking help when he may be feeling ‘some kind of way’, so to speak, we were alarmed to discover the number of celebrities who are struggling with depression or have lost their lives to this disease. Unfortunately, most African American’s who struggle in this area do NOT discuss what they are feeling due to society’s stigma associated with it. Many men silently suffer and often times those closest to them may not even be aware of what’s going on with  them.

Sometimes the reaction is fatal – such as the case of the Cleveland, Ohio man who succumbed to his fight with depression by…

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rpale1

Ok….here goes. I’m selfish. There, I’ve said it.

I am now in the second chapter of my life and I am actually Loving it! Gone are the days when it was more important for me to please others or put their well-being ahead of my own. It feels good hearing myself say no for a change. No, I will NOT lend you money to pay your cellphone bill because you chose to purchase those over-priced shoes instead of making sure your only means of communication during your job search was secure. Yes, I DO mind babysitting your child on my day off. No, you can NOT borrow my car until you’re able to rent one. ….hey, I think I can get the hang of this…

I woke up one morning and decided that I am very important to me. I love my smile, I feel sexiest when my hair is uncombed and I’m wearing sweat pants and tennis…

View original post 291 more words

I recently had a conversation with a very good friend of mine concerning the disparity of suicide and depression within the African American culture and the stigma’s attached to it.

While discussing the plight of the African American male and his lack of communication in reaching out and seeking help when he may be feeling ‘some kind of way’, so to speak, we were alarmed to discover the number of celebrities who are struggling with depression or have lost their lives to this disease. Unfortunately, most African American’s who struggle in this area do NOT discuss what they are feeling due to society’s stigma associated with it. Many men silently suffer and often times those closest to them may not even be aware of what’s going on with  them.

Sometimes the reaction is fatal – such as the case of the Cleveland, Ohio man who succumbed to his fight with depression by killing his beloved 6 year old daughter and turning the gun on himself. Or the actor Lee Thompson, who recently committed suicide after dealing with depression.

As a woman, it frightens me knowing that the next guy I might meet could possibly be battling with depression and not disclose it to me. Will I recognize the signs in time? I can only hope that I will and that he will be willing to let me help him seek help/treatment. I’m not trying to save the world, but I will never be accused of being a side-line person who is more comfortable turning a blind eye to a cry for help. I’m just saying………

 

Ok….here goes. I’m selfish. There, I’ve said it.

I am now in the second chapter of my life and I am actually Loving it! Gone are the days when it was more important for me to please others or put their well-being ahead of my own. It feels good hearing myself say no for a change. No, I will NOT lend you money to pay your cellphone bill because you chose to purchase those over-priced shoes instead of making sure your only means of communication during your job search was secure. Yes, I DO mind babysitting your child on my day off. No, you can NOT borrow my car until you’re able to rent one. ….hey, I think I can get the hang of this…

I woke up one morning and decided that I am very important to me. I love my smile, I feel sexiest when my hair is uncombed and I’m wearing sweat pants and tennis shoes, I enjoy trashy reality television programs like the Real Housewives series, I will give my four year old grandkids as much candy as their little hearts desire today then send them home with their parents. Ok, that last one might not go over very well with my son, but hey, oh well, I’m selfish. I have devoted too many days insuring my kids ate adequate doses of healthy food. Thanks to my grandkids, I can now throw caution to the wind and just indulge in white chocolate covered strawberries (my favorites) and Blue Bell Moo- lenium Crunch Ice Cream.

Chapter 2 of my life will consist of a career change, maybe a drastic haircut, acceptance of my marital status, and more community involvement. Oh….and I will focus more on my retirement planning and savings.

More consistent blogging is an important addition to the new me. I have a lot to say and will utilize my platform of blogging to voice my opinions, ideas, thoughts and complaints. Today, I ran across a photo in a magazine of an extremely youthful – looking 44 year old woman who had the audacity to sport a full head of thick, completely grey hair and she looked amazing! I could not turn away from the irony of her appearance. I want that look of acceptance and confidence that jumped at me from within those pages. I guess you can say my Chapter 2 will start and end with embracing the beauty of me . I can’t promise you I’ll turn away from my bottle of Ms. Clairol yet – we have a lifelong love affair – but I will allow my naturally curly, angry curls to hang freely more often. It’s a slow start, but a start nonetheless.

Stay tuned for Chapter 3!